It’s worthwhile to invest the time now so you can hopefully prevent heartbreak and damage to your family later.Rather than looking for the right person, become the right person.God’s goals for dating are healthy marriages and families.
SEE ALSO: Part-Time Parenting Make a wise decision about marriage.
Ask God to help you decide whether or not to marry if you reach a point where: you have confidence in your dating relationship; trust that both you and your boyfriend or girlfriend is completely committed to sacrificially loving each other and each other’s children; all the children involved are reasonably open to your union and new family; and the children’s emotional, psychological, and spiritual health will be well-served by your marriage.
SEE ALSO: Best Practices for Dating Single Parents (and the Singles Who Date Them) Deal with your fears.
Since fear is incompatible with love (it prevents you from doing what love leads you to do), you need to identify your fears and pray for God to help you overcome them in order to enjoy a successful dating relationship.
Keep in mind that the loss of your previous marriage has permanently changed you and your kids, but those changes can result in you all growing to become stronger people who are more like Jesus.
Surrender your own will for your dating life to God and trust Him to lead you as you consider new dating relationships.
In addition, consider the attitudes and behaviors of the person’s children, and the entire package of that person’s life (such as the state of his or her finances and relationships with extended family). Noticing certain issues in your dating relationship should get your attention.
You need to put a stop to your dating relationship if the person you’re dating: doesn’t have a relationship with Christ, is pressuring you to get married before you’re ready to do so, has an extremely different approach to parenting than you do, is addicted to alcohol or drugs, demands to be the center of attention all the time, can’t stop his or her ex-spouse from interfering in your life in damaging ways, or wants to live with you before marriage.
When you’re a single parent or dating someone who is, you need to consider more than just whether or not your relationship should lead to marriage.